Revenge of the Sith!

There was a couple of key words you'd find in every Episode I and II review: suck and crap. This time around, we have a new keyword: DARK.

Yes, DARK. Lucas could almost buy rights to this word, as it seems to pop up in every single anticipating article/review of Episode III.

"It looks dark. It's like, so dark. I mean, like, black hole dark. It's going to be much darker than the others..."

But let's analyse the word DARK for a moment. The obvious definition is that it represents the absense of LIGHT. In this definition, they are correct. Space is very DARK. Another definition, and I assume the proper one in context of this film, is CREEPY, or SPOOKY, or DEVILISH.

Will the new Episode III be spooky? Survey says...NO.

I know, I know, none of you want to hear more anti-Star Wars rhetoric from me. I will allow you to thrive in your nerdy womb-like demeanor for the time being, but I want to set the record straight on one thing. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith will probably be a lot of things (and I oh so cannot wait to share those things with you all). But one thing it won't be is DARK.

(Except, of course, if you see this film in a theatre without Digital Projectors, it will most certainly be dark, grainy, and blurry.)

There is no way, no how, not a prayer in the world, that Hayden Christensen can become a threatening, scary character. No amount of colored contacts or fiery CGI will accomplish this task.

By the way, if any of you want to know the end of the movie, highlight the following text:

---->Natalie Portman dies while giving birth<----

Enjoy!

posted by steven @ 12:50 AM